Have you ever lost connection with a family member because of some silly family feud that has gone on so long you don’t even know what the feud was all about?

I want to share a story with you that I hope will give you some inspiration to healing any incomplete family relationships.

One of the benefits of being raised by really young parents that separated when I was two was that I had a lot of family influences growing up.

One of the main influence in my life was my Uncle Dan (my Dad’s older Brother). He was single and didn’t have any children of his own, so when my Mom was off dating other men and my Father had his second family, my Uncle Dan became my solid rock in my life and to be honest spoiled me rotten.  He referred to me as his “Princess” and treated like one too. We travelled to Hawaii and Disneyland frequently where I have many fond memories. My time with my Uncle Dan was a precious treat and although I likely took it for granted when I was a child, I grew up appreciating the traits I acquired from him.

He was a very savvy entrepreneurial business man as well as a bit of a techno geek. He bought me my first computer…a Commodore 64…do you remember those? He taught me how to use DOS and I remember a lot of my time spent with him was at the office where I would play on the computer doing speed typing games…I think I was 9. To this day I credit much of my entrepreneurial spirit and my own techno geek tendencies to him.

My Grandmother was a very smart business woman and built a successful long term care business that she passed down to my Uncle and Father. They ran it together for years, but eventually brotherly feuds over business led to them splitting their business. Not long after that my Uncle met the woman he would marry, who is now his wife, and it seems since then the family was split as well.  There was no more communication between my Uncle and my Dad or myself. I know there was some specific feud, but it was so long ago I really don’t even know what it was about. I think it has been going on for 20 years.

Over the years I have made many attempts to reconnect with him. I would stop by his office, I would send him cards including Christmas and Birthday cards every year but most attempts to reconnect were diverted by his wife. The last attempt I made to contact him his wife told me quite clearly to stop any further attempts. I was devastated to say the least. My husband who I have known for 18 years and my 2 girls have never met him although my husband has heard many many many stories of this almost mythical Uncle Dan.

Well 2 days ago he shows up at my Half Brother’s nursery (http://www.kjmcountrygardens.com/) claiming he had some gardening issues and he was recommended it was the best place to go. It seemed from a comment he made when he was there  ”we are getting too old for all of this” that he may just be open to reconnecting with the family.

My Father had a concert that he was singing at yesterday that our whole family was planning on going to and I took the opportunity and called Uncle Dan and invited him to join us for dinner and to my Dad’s concert. I could hardly believe it when he responded immediately that he would at least come to the concert.

I couldn’t help think that it was too good to be true and that he may not show up…but he actually showed up not only for the concert but for dinner as well! There was 13 of us for dinner so I imagine it was quite over whelming for him.

Later that evening as we sat in the concert I sat in disbelief and tears secretly running down my face with my Uncle Dan sitting by my side as we listened to my Dad sing in his choir. I was overwhelmed with gratitude and realized it was definitely one of the happiest moments since my daughters were born.

I grew up with more family disfunction than I could share with you in this short story but last night it all came together and none of that mattered. We healed our family in one night and what most people would never consider possible was a reality.

My Dad was singing in his ex-girlfriends choir, with his ex-wife (my Mom), my Mom’s Mom, his 3 children from his second marriage, me and my husband and our daughter Vanessa and his long lost brother all under one roof. Truly a miracle!

So if you have any family relationships that you think are broken and there is no possibility of fixing or perhaps there is too much disfunction to repair. Don’t give up. Be persistent and give people the chance and the space to changee and be ready to open your arms with unconditional love and let the history of pain be healed in an instant.

Thank you following me through this tale of my family history. If you liked this story I’d love to hear from you so comment below and click the link to share it.